Sunday, February 7, 2010

I haven't posted anything in a very long time... Thats because I've been writing an rewriting a number of things over and over again. I've got this need to write a boat load of poems about burnt out buildings, abandoned midwestern downtown avenues, and women trapped in relationships they got into when they were 17 and their husbands weren't alcoholics.

I don't know why I have this compulsion, but I am very glad to have it. I assume it has something to do with no longer feeling very sorry for myself. I feel that 2009, and the small amount of poetry I produced in its last half, were the result of retaining too many impulses and not acting on my values and talents. How does one defeat depression? I don't know, all I know is that sometimes dropping out of school twice can be helpful, even if your grades are O-K.

Also, if you ever find out that someone you helped out in the past failed to ever recognize that you had a hand in their brief successes, and subsequently spent 2 years lying to you about robbing a business where you helped them get a job...? Well may be you could forgive them if you can find a way for them to show you they've changed... But what if their story changes every time you hear it? In that case, go ahead and spend a brief week selling that motherfucker down the river in every way you can. After you've made your knowledge available to all concerned parties you can go ahead and make sure you keep the hell away from them. They do not deserve anything from you. Actions such as this will also lead to inner peace and happiness.

I know there's no rest for the obsessed
So I charm preoccupations until they're gettin undressed
Once abstractions are naked I'm always hard pressed
To remember what was curious about stressing so furious
Over and over and over and over again
Digging what was buried, digging what was trend
Its no crime to want but its a shame to pretend
That its something when its not
I'd rather not chase things so easily forgot
Like when I got them caught in a lie
When I'm not the mote in they eye
Like when I got them caught in a lie
Know I'm not guilty of not havin tried.

I know there's no rest for the obsessed
But when all I wanna hear is fault confessed
Takes a second to remember can't squeeze water from stone
So I'll ask a happy liar to please just leave me alone.

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